First, let me preface this by saying that as much as I feel the desire to smoke, I will not start. You do not need to send me emails and comments encouraging me to make the right decision. I’m just struggling with this and I know there must be other people out their going through the same thing, so I’m writing about it. Plus, I think it will help me cope. Writing always does that.
After that very important intro, let’s get to the meat of this post.
I cannot explain why, but for about three months, I have been hankerin’ for a cigarette. I smoked at parties in college for about a semester. I was exposed to it some as a child because several of my aunts and uncles smoked. But I was never, by any definition, a regular smoker. I’ve never dated a smoker. Only one of my best friends smokes. So why am I having these urges?
The prevalence of smoking here? Maybe. Stress? Depression? Yes and yes. Would giving in and smoking solve those problems? Nope. It wouldn’t even start. In fact, it would probably make things worse. So I was thinking today about these strange urges and realized a few things.
5 Reason I Won’t Light Up
- Do I even need to mention the health reasons for not taking up this bad habit? It would interfere with my ability to breathe, and therefore my running. It weakens the immune system. It could discolor my fingers, fingernails, and teeth.
- It’s addictive. I am trying to eliminate addictions from my life, not add them.
- It’s expensive. Like any addiction, whether it’s to Cheez-its and Dr. Pepper or blow, cigarette smoking would make me spend money on something other than a car, a home, and our future. And I don’t want that.
- I like having fresh smelling clothes and breath. I have yet to meet a smoker who didn’t have either smoker’s breath or smoky smelling clothes. I don’t want to be like that. I love that fresh laundry smell. I have always been self-conscious about having bad breath or body odor, so I don’t really want to add another odor to be self-conscious about.
- I need to find a real solution for my stress and depression, and cigarettes aren’t it. Making myself be organized lifts my spirits. Focusing on why I’m excited to be in Germany makes me happy. Being grateful makes can wipe away the grime. And getting things done can decrease my stress. Cigarettes would just be a temporary solution, a band-aid fix.
Question of the Day
How do you deal with the urges you have but choose not to give in to?